It's hard to make it through the day when the one you love is slowly dying and suffering daily. The days are long and the nights can be restless. I have to constanstly remind myself to enjoy this moment and thank God that you still have it no matter what it is.
I can't choose the outcome so I have to accept that. I cant heal him I have to accept that, I can't do it without God and I have to accept that. All easier said than done.
I Don't mean to complain but I'm just getting some stuff out and everyone asks me how I'm doing. I try to always give positive hopeful answers but deep inside its not so positive and is very hard to answer some of the questons with those positive answers but God walks me through it. Josh is faced with a very hard decsion and doesn't know what he's going to do.
I will support him in whatever that decsion may be but either way we have a long bumpy road to travel.It can be hard to move forward when life seems to be at a steady halt and reality slaps you in the face.
The other night Josh and I were talking about what is going and and we asked God to give us hope, and stronger faith, to take away our fears and give it all to him so that we can see what it is he wants us to do. God is faithful and if were are too we will receive his many blessing and be able to enjoy life every day in the moment and be thankful.
So, my new years resolution for this year and always is to live in the moment and enjoy it, always have faith, pray because God answers prayer, and love because it helps you to keep going when times are tough and hug someone when they are down because the feeling of a good hug is mutual.
Hey kiddo,
ReplyDeleteI know you are both going through it...and I can only imagine how hard it is...because I know how hard it is on me...on us...here...fighting fear and frustration and biting my tongue because I want someone to blame for my son's situation...and yours by his side...but it is hard not to hide...and it just stinks...I KNOW...that there is a plan...but I haven't a clue what it is either...I do know though that as much as God can point in a direction...he did give each of us free will...so Josh will need to decide in the end...because it is his choice to make...even with God's help...it will be Joshua's decision.
I can't even wrap my brain around how tough it is...to make that choice...I keep trying...but I know I don't even have a clue. Your words here are meaningful and right...keep seeking God...and keep hugging and holding on to each other and remembering the moment. It is truly all we have. Keep writing...I will read...Heather will read...keep it up...and remember...we are always here with you if you need us...need a shoulder or a friend...don't hesitate to reach out.
I agree with papa! Lots of praying, hugs, kisses and josh will find what he needs to do! I can only imagen what it must be like...I love you. It makes me sad to think how hard it is for you and joshy. And how much I think of you both. I love you both more than I could every say. And as for you my sister I want you to know something, YOU my dear are josh's gift. I don't think he could do this without you! It is a hard time now...but enjoy your moments and his will find his answere and you yours.
ReplyDeleteI love you! Hugs you!!!